Thursday, 27 October 2011

Who angers you controls you

have you ever had to deal with someone whose mood depends on how things are going with their significant other? you would call them today and by the way they say 'hello' on the other end of the line you automatically knew that all is well. the phone was answered on the first ring, they were singing and was all cheery with their salutation, wanting to chat and talk about world peace, dying humanity and being an integral part of giving back to their community.

if the sex was off the wall the night before, they would tell you about how great it is to be in love, and how much you are missing out on because you don't have someone to call your'd have to also hear about how romantic it was when he attached a kiss emoticon at the end of his text or how many times she told him she was into him in front of his friends at the mall that afertoon. they would have been blabbing for about a good 7 minutes when all you would have gotten into the call that YOU placed was a mere hello.

of course, you're either (a) jealous  (b)happy for them but jealous or (c) clustered with all the mushyness, so you decide to call them back  a few days later in they hope that  they returned to planet earth.

so mid week you call happy hannah/mesmerised michael back, and the phone goes well into the fifth ring and you are greeted with this half hearted 'hello'. you are hearing what sounds like mary j blige's 'not gon cry' blasting in the background. in steps a deafening silence as hannah is on the other line and isnt saying anything. as you ask 'hey whats up?' that is followed by a long pause continued with an extended sigh and when she finally musters up an answer it's the ever popular 'nothin'. suddenly you have gone from friend to investigative officer as you try to probe for the reasons for the sudden change in mood.

and then ... AHA! you found out there was a little disagreement with the boo the night before. suddenly the conversation shifts to complimenting you on your single life  and encouraging you to stay single and enjoy your alone time. if it's not that, they ask if they can call you back or, if you're like me you suddenly announce that there is a call on the other line from overseas.

A few minutes after that, there is the status change or the tweet saying 'i'm doing me' 'don't make someone a priority when you are their option' or the lastest addition 'sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead'. all the love and happyness that was there 3 days earlier has suddenly vanished.

why we allow the ones we are in love or in like with to dictate our overrall mood never ceases to amaze me. half the time we give control of our lives to people who have not shown us that they deserve to be there. the reality is only when someone cares about what you are thinking, they will be mindful of how they build u up and break you down.

and until they do, try to find joy, in who finds joy in you.


  1. I am loving this article. So true, people should not have control of your emotions, we are responsible for that.

    Its sad that women don't know their worth and it are consume by how men view them.

    Keep up the good work...........

  2. So true, I absolutely love this post....